Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Even Life Inbetween IVFs Isn't So Easy. But It's Still Better Than Stabbing Myself With Hormone Injections Daily.

It's been a nutty month or so. In a quick nutshell - my car finally died (may she rest in peace, sweet '94 MBZ with awesome automated seatbelts affectionately named Vern and George); I took over use of a family member's car; and said "new" car became the sandwich meat inside a 3-car pileup (with me and my dog inside). The dog and I are OK but the car has seen better days.  Said new car is now in the shop for what feels like an eternity. 

In other news, I am now working 2 temp jobs - last week was a 90+ hour week.  The 2nd temp job is temporary (really) so I should only have to keep up the schedule for at most another week.  I am officially leading a double life - call me Donna Draper or Clarkina Kent.  Well, except I'm not saving the world - just working on saving myself right now! 

In bambino news, I am still not pregnant after a THIRD trip to San Francisco 2 weeks ago for some implantation a naturale (s-e-x).  The s-e-x is complicating things for sure but now that I have a bit of distance I am putting that all aside for now because I'm honestly just too busy and tired to think about it.  More on that later for sure. 

But, I think it is finally hitting me that I just may be infertile.  It's only taken a YEAR of nonstop BFNs and 2 birthdays involving the number 4 for me to figure this out.  I guess when you really want something you don't let reality get in the way. Or something.  I don't know how I will cope if I can't have a baby of my own. I just don't know.

So tomorrow I go back to my RE to begin the showdown for IVF #2.  The final frontier.

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